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Lewis Black Quotes  
AMUSING 

Tags: Lewis Black, comedian, funny quotes

Black is a somewhat controversial comedian because he seems to be a rather...angry performer...he's still pretty funny though.

	“In my lifetime, we've gone from Eisenhower to George W. Bush. We've gone from John F. Kennedy to Al Gore. If this is evolution, I believe that in twelve years, we'll be voting for plants.”
	“A republican stands up in congress and says 'I GOT A REALLY BAD IDEA!!' and the democrat stands up after him and says 'AND I CAN MAKE IT SHITTIER!!'”
	“There's no such thing as soy milk. It's soy juice.”
	"Candy Corn is the only candy in the history of America that's never been advertised. And there's a reason. All of the candy corn that was ever made was made in 1911."
	"You don't want another Enron? Here's your law: If a company can't explain in ONE SENTENCE what it does....it's illegal."
	"I do have certain feelings. My feeling is that whoever is in charge, I want him out."
	"If the people of New Zealand want to be a part of our world, I believe they should hop off their islands, and push 'em closer."
	"And then there's the Homeland Security system, they had it color-coded, like we're in fucking elementery school! Simplify it, there should be just three levels of security; Jesus Christ, Goddammit, FUCK ME!"
	"It was a really special winter wasn't it?... if you're a fucking moose! If you've got fur on your nuts it's been a fucking festival!"
	"I'm always amazed when I hear people saying; 'That George Bush, he's a great leader'. And I wonder, where can one find a drug that would make one so delusional?"

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