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Look Like A Rockstar In 10 Easy Steps
HOW TO
Tags: rock, rockstar, style, guitar, music, tattoo
Want to be a rockstar? You're going to have to talk the talk and walk the walk. Here is the outline you must abide by.
| 1. | Perfect your smug, yet devilishly sexy sneer. |
| 2. | Learn to play the guitar. Or, take a hint from Pete Wentz and pretend to learn to play guitar. |
| 3. | Get lots and lots of tattoes. Some must haves: nautical stars, references to ex-girlfriends or drugs, dark and gramatically questionable sentance fragments (eg, "slip under suns flicker.fade", or something else you found on myspace), song lyrics, perferably your own. |
| 4. | Get some groupies! 14 year old girls usually do well in this category, as well as strung out looking blondes. You'll be uprading to supermodels and heiresses soon enough. Fake it 'til you make it. |
| 5. | Make sure you are wearing more makeup than said groupies. |
| 6. | Stop eating, or become an intravenous drug user, whichever your diet of choice is. |
| 7. | Grow your hair out, or do a modern version of the Flock Of Seagulls look. |
| 8. | Tight pants are a must. Leather pants are kind of out if you're under 40; tight jeans are really preferably here. They have to be slung low enough that you can see the nautical stars you have tattooed precariously between your razor-sharp hipbones. |
| 9. | Make sure you sing through your nose, and that your voice is perpetually raspy. The lyrics you wrote sound better this way. |
| 10. | Oh, develop an alcohol problem. Obviously. |
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