| | Do work |
| | Rob: Have you ever farted and it didn't smell?
Big: Not since I was 13. |
| | Put ya ham on him son......put ham on him. |
| | Wing King baby... wing king! |
| | Rob: I'm the skater in the family.
Big: I'm the bodyguard.
Rob: (Points to Meaty) And you're the puppy. |
| | "I refuse to believe that that poorly crafted piece of cat-wood is 3000 dollars." |
| | 22's son, 22's |
| | "whatcha momma say STOMP, whatcha papa say STOMP" |
| | Rob: And I want to kickflip an alligator |
| | Big: Its like they're all pop and country... we're hip-hop. |
| | Rob: Did you fart?
Big: I don't know. What are you talking about?
Rob: I caught fart in the air. Did you fart?
Big: Did I fart? Yes I did. |
| | Big: (To Meaty) What's up with your hole, man? Talk to me, dog. |
| | Big: "Stripping is like ridin' a bike...." |
| | "I'm going to ollie a gator!" |
| | Drama: "im a skater..."
Big: "When was the last time you skated?"
Drama: "Like, a month ago."
Big: "Poser" |
| | "Did someone poop in the pool?" |
| | "I don't recognize this dude" |
| | Big: Hell yeah, drop dat turtle baby! |
| | Rob: I'll see you next week and I promise we are going to have the fastest turtle in the history of turtles. |
| | Big: We've got to come in hot. |
| | Big: I need a 6X shirt with rhinestones on it. |
| | Big: You kick me... I'm kicking your ass! Damn PETA |
| | Rob: "I found out that a person who studies turtles is a herpetologist... so maybe we go talk to the Herpy...." |
| | Rob: I know this horse is just gonna dump. We are going to have to make a stop every 20 minutes do to this horse dung,
Big: Thats alright man. We gotta do what we gotta do to get a champion in this house. |
| | Rob: I'm a puke quesadilla right now. |
| | Big: Smell like doo-doo in here?
Rob: Everything I smell smells like doo-doo. |
| | Big: Dude, I'm saying no mud around my weiner. |
| | Big: Do Work son |
| | Big: "Why are You trying to catch me riding dirty, copper" |
| | Big: "It's Hot In The Streets" |
| | Rob: Why do old people need fiber?
Big: I guess to get those doo-doo's out. |
| | Big: Dude he gets fanned on pretty much a lot. (about Meaty) |
| | Rob: Hey can you grab my board? I am about to break a world record. |
| | Big: When your body is tired... exercise your mind. |
| | Rob: Why are you humping me mid-afternoon? |
| | Big: Drama, I am going to need you to blowdry my crotch. |
| | Rob: "We're a world record setting team! World record hug." |
| | Rob: My records can buy beer. |
| | Big: These chairs right here, not massive ass certified.... Boy coming in hot with some ass power... look at this.... thats half a cheek on there |
| | Big: Boy gotta turn duck and roll to get out the couch. |
| | Rob: Thats Big Bob bitch.... awe whats up kid?... why you fucking with Big Bob right now... Big Bob will eat you up..... Look at me! |
| | Rob: Dude, Elmo's kind of hood. |
| | Rob: She's dancin with the cream... I love that there's so many different forms of crazy. There's crazy people that kill people, and then there's crazy people that do this - dance on Melrose with Josh Kalis' DC shoes on. |
| | Big: Let a bum live the "Street Dreams"... that's all he's got. |
| | Rob: It's your boy Bam Bam's sweat pants... Dude, smell that. That's rotten meat. |
| | Big: Fat man's funk... smells like rump. |
| | Bum pack.... hobo hookup... homeless hookup! |
| | Rob: Skid row is about to get laced. |
| | Big: My name is Clarkston the 3rd... I'm a philanthropist. |
| | Rob: They're comin in hot right now. That's a frenzy! |
| | Big: Skid rizzie ain't no joke |
| | Rob: Have you ever seen a man this large catch some air? |
| | Rob: He just blew his nuts out.
Big: His nuts is shot... Dude, check your nuts. |
| | Zeus: I'm goin in the foam. |
| | Big: There's one population of people we haven't given back to yet.
Rob: Strippers?
Big: Nah, we give to them all the time. ... ...Old folks. |
| | (old woman at Westwood Horizons): An hour ago I thought I was going to die... Now, I feel - happy! |
| | Big: See what I told you... old people aren't as scary as you'd think. |
| | Rob: I need the life version of IcyHot |
| | Big: You're getting treatment through some wallpaper? |
| | Harry the Healer: Well that's Master J |
| | Big: [Rob] looks like a fish out of water right now... looks like a guppy. |
| | Big: I am gonna break a little wind... alright... rip on. |
| | Rob: Proof is in the pudding with that Sacred G |
| | Rob: I hate the word "two dollars"... there's a reason there's no two-dollar bill |
| | Big: That's what happens when you put your faith in wallpaper. |
| | Big: Oh no... I'm a male stripper... I got moves. |
| | Steve Berra: That was G Money... So basically Sacred G is cheating. Sacred G is steroids.... if that works, I am getting some of them stickers. |
| | Big: There's some good girls on the Space right now. |
| | Rob: If you got tattoos above your vagina, your dirty. |
| | Rob: Dude lets get to Vegas, I got bottles, I got a table, I got money to lose. |
| | Rob: You're 14 years old and your eatin' horse doodoo. |
| | Rob: [about Meaty] His favorite flavor is everything... You know what he really likes, mini-horse doo-doo. |
| | Big: It's like my car's been super sized.... Greasy super sized. |
| | Big: Do not give me sports as my SMUT. I want that separate, like Church and State. |
| | Rob: I can fake Picasso's! |
| | Rob: Crap Happy... Crap Happy. I'm so happy to crap. Crap, crap, crappy crap... I crapped you crapped everybody crapped. Crap crap crappers. Every know and then I have to crap. ... I have some coffee and I have to crap! ..... ... You look lovely tonight... Drama you look like crap! |
| | Rob: I'm a magician! Pick a hand... pick a hand. I am not kidding you. Pick a hand... (left hand) nothing... (right hand) nothing. I'm a magician! |