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How to Arrange Your Action Figures
HOW TO 
Tags: action, figure, cubicle, decorations, tchotchkes, jobs, office, funny, amusing, Robot Chicken
Careful, those aren't toys! Tom Root and Douglas Goldstein, the two head writers for the Adult Swim figure-fest Robot Chicken, offer advanced tips on curating your cubicle tchotchkes.
| 1. | Make sure they stay standing. As figures get more and more intricate, they're more and more likely to fall over. Hit the feet with some adhesive pads or sticky tack. |
| 2. | Put some thought into the groupings. Nothing says "I don't care" like jumbling together Star Trek: TOS with Star Trek: TNG. And watch out for bad symbolism: If you work in HR, don't put Darth-anything on your desk. |
| 3. | Avoid excessively gory figures. Rule of thumb: If you can see brains and/or viscera, don't display it. Also, ixnay on the scantily clad Playmates or porn stars -- you'll just look desperate and lonely. Finally, eschew cutesy figures. If the best you can do is Papa Smurf with a fishing pole, just forget it. (Irony is no defense.) |
| 4. | Hide the accessories. Most action figures come with tiny accoutrements that are almost certain to get lost. Leave these precious extras at home where they're safe. "Take it from a guy who's still mourning the loss of his Bespin Luke's yellow lightsaber," Root says. |
| 5. | Spread out the toys so that if one does fall, it won't start a domino effect. You don't want to return from lunch to find Robin's face in Batman's crotch. |
| 6. | Never pose figures in compromising positions. Sure, it's funny to make He-Man and She-Ra get all buck wild... until you're slapped with a harassment lawsuit. |
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